About this book
What is happening to you is not your fault.
Emotional abuse without physical violence is among the most serious, and most consistently misread, forms of intimate partner harm. It leaves no bruise that a doctor can photograph, no incident that a friend can point to. It leaves people exhausted, confused, and convinced that something is wrong with them, when the truth is that something has been done to them.
Drawing on more than two decades of clinical practice and academic teaching in mental health nursing, Dr Benjamin Ajibade examines why coercive control is so difficult to name, why leaving is never as simple as walking away, and what genuine recovery actually requires.
The book moves through three movements: naming what emotional abuse is and what it does to the body and brain; examining the real barriers to leaving, including cultural silence, religious frameworks, financial entrapment, and the erosion of identity; and turning toward what recovery and courage actually look like once the decision has been made.
Each chapter is grounded in composite case studies drawn from clinical experience and the published research literature, spanning a deliberately wide range of genders, cultural backgrounds, religious affiliations, and structural positions.
This book is written for anyone in or near a toxic relationship, for healthcare and mental health professionals, for racially minoritised communities, and for faith leaders and educators who are often the first point of contact for someone in crisis.
